THE UN-WEDDING

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Dan & Adam's Beautiful Big Gay Wedding at Trading Boundaries

Written by Helen-Louise Dudney

Photography by Sidey Clark

Brace yourselves for some gay wedding inspiration at it’s absolute finest!

All marriages are special, and epic may be a word that lots of people use to describe a wedding, but Dan and Adam’s Big wedding was so much more, it was truly iconic for so many reasons… the biggest, most beautiful gay wedding the world has ever seen!

Dan and Adam's love story sounds like it was written in the stars from the start. It was back in 2009 when they met through their mutual friend, at a disco night held by Boogaloo Stu, who would go on to DJ at their wedding. It sounds nuts to say, but on the night they met, gay marriage wasn’t legal in the UK!!

With their shared love of creativity and adventure, for the first time Dan and Adam were in a relationship where everything felt right and after being together for a year came THE proposal.

100 Ring Proposal

Whilst on a picnic Dan didn’t just have the ring to propose, he had 100! Go big or go home, right?

Knowing Adam would want to pick his own ring, he laid out 100 rings on the table when Adam wasn’t looking for him to choose. And the other 99? … well, they are framed as the perfect keepsake of the day.

Planning The Wedding

How many couples get to have their wedding documented by the BBC?!

If you haven’t already watched the BBC documentary Big Gay Wedding with Tom Allen, which aired on 27th March 2024 I urge you to right away….well as soon as you’ve finished reading this. An important lesson in gay history that will make you realise how hard people had to fight for their love to be recognised.

Dan and Adam were clear from the beginning that they wanted to get married. They felt that a civil partnership would be settling for something less than what everyone else was getting and, whereas a civil partnership appeared to be primarily for legal purposes, for them marriage was a deeper commitment and for love.

Adam and Dan had been engaged for 8 years when they saw that the BBC was making a programme to celebrate 10 years of gay marriage and were looking for an engaged couple who hadn’t made too many plans. This was the perfect opportunity for Dan and Adam who were saving for their wedding but had yet to to set a date. 

The BBC documentary gave them 10 weeks to plan EVERYTHING!

Despite Dan and Adam’s wedding being part of the documentary they never lost sight that it was their wedding day and made sure they held onto their vision to ensure they had the day they wanted. If you’re looking for some gay wedding inspiration, you won’t find a better example than this wonderous celebration!

Mushroom button holes in tiny pottery vases that Adam made into pins.

There is nothing not to love in the picture… it is EVERYTHING!

For reasons beyond it being their wedding day, it was SO important to Dan and Adam for them to have a really good wedding album to look back on, and their choice of photographer could not have been more perfect. Book Of Love directory’s, Sidey Clark, understood the significance of preserving memories from the day, and went above and beyond to capture Dan and Adam’s amazing day flawlessly and looked great doing so!

It took weeks of searching to finally find their wildcard venue, but once they had, it helped everything fall into place. Trading Boundaries is not a dedicated wedding venue but the converted coach house in the Sussex countryside had accommodation on site and different zones Dan and Adam could imagine their day moving through. Oh and a gorgeous Indian marquee with tassels that made it the perfect camp tent.

Seven years after they met Adam and Dan completed their family with the addition of their pug, Egg who, assisted by Tom Allen was ring bearer on the big day.

The Theme… Pastels! Flowers! Cake! Disco!

Dan and Adam had both dreamt of living in Brighton when they were younger and love living in the UK’s gay capital. They wanted their wedding to reflect them and to share a taster of what their life is like with their friends and family. With your wedding day, Adam said “you get to have one day where you get to do all of the little things that you think all of your friends and family will enjoy that represent you”. 

Their mood board was INCREDIBLE and filled with colourful, camp ideas. They went for a mix of styles that were both affordable and they could create themselves, but not like Blue Peter try it yourself at home - Adam is a former competitor on Great Pottery Throwdown and an awesome ceramicist and Dan is a graphic designer so you know it’s going to look shit hot, and it did.

The table settings were all things from Dan and Adam’s house including some very cool pieces made by Adam.

As for the entertainment, Adam and Dan knew they wanted Dolly Rocket and Bugaloo Stu to ensure the energy was kept up throughout the meal and into the evening.

Dan and Adam didn’t follow a trend but instead set them. They asked their guests to embrace pastels and skip the navy blue and black attire. The result? Well you can see for yourself how amazing the pictures look.

Gorgeous, eclectic pieces from Adam and Dan’s house used creatively to accessorise the venue.

The Outfits

With such a gorgeous mood board and eye for colour and detail, it’s easy to see that these two have STYLE and boy did they showcase this on their wedding day. As Dan said they’re only going to be grooms once!

They wanted personal outfits that needed to compliment each other and when asked by the stylist on the BBC programme about their look the reply was “We want to up the camp and just go to town on it.” They purchased their jackets from ASOS and then had them embellished and altered by their seamstress to make them completely unique to them. They made everything their own, even down to their brogues which they painted to match the colour palette, as they couldn’t find any to buy.

And as for the outfit change, WOW! Dan and Adam wanted their outfits to match the camp entertainment and do away with any formal element and the result was, they looked incredible. Their all in one sparkly jumpsuits were literally lifted from the original moodboard…only better!

The gorgeous pastel suits embellished with appliques of lace.

Painted brogues with accent coloured laces.

10 Tier Cake!

There were some elements of the day that Dan and Adam really wanted to stand out and one of those was the cake. And when I say cake I mean CAKE!

Ten tiers to celebrate 10 years of gay marriage.

Physically and aesthetically it was a work of art. It might have taken a ladder to cut it but they even did that in style, and Dan and Adam’s awesome plan to serve the cake to their wedding guests themselves so they could talk to everyone was genius.

Symbolic, incredible and SO tasty and edible…well 5 of the tiers are.

The emphasis on camp aesthetics truly shone through in the whimsical floral arrangements for their wedding. The florist skillfully blurred the lines of the traditional bridal bouquets to compliment Dan and Adam's stylish pastel suits, capturing the essence of their unique style.

Nobody captures a cloud of confetti better than Sidey Clark

Making New Traditions

Whilst Adam and Dan's decision to incorporate some (what has up to now been considered as) more bridal traditions, like having a best man and ‘bridesmaids’ they inadvertently paved the way of making their own traditions and as such redefining what marriage ceremonies can look like - which in this case, is on point and mind-blowing!

Adam and Dan's disco style first dance, choreographed by Oti Mabuse and with a live performance by Sophie Ellis-Bextor, defied tradition and captivated their guests. Although it might not have gone exactly as rehearsed, their personal flair and the fun they had doing it showcased their love and individuality. The energy and creativity they brought to the dance floor set the tone for the rest of their wedding celebration.

Dan and Adam having fun with their first dance whilst trying not to be star struck by Sophie Ellis-Bextor

Dan and Adam's decision to forgo speeches at their wedding was a reflection of their confidence in their celebrant, Chloe Green Celebrant. Chloe's exceptional storytelling skills and captivating personality made her the perfect choice to narrate their love story. With her ability to strike the right balance between heartfelt moments and humour, Chloe left a lasting impression on all the guests. Not to mention, her impeccable sense of style effortlessly complemented the wedding's colour scheme.

Chloe Green Celebrant doing what she does best!

Adam and Dan made their mood board come to life and then some! Their wedding really was the best celebration in every way, of their individuality, who they are as a couple and ultimately their love for each other which oozed out of every aspect of their day.

Suppliers

Photographer: Sidey Clark

Celebrant: Chloe Green Celebrant

DJ: Boogaloo Stu

Venue: Trading Boundaries

Cake Maker: Bee May Baker

Suit Jackets: ASOS

Suit Trousers: M&S and Topman

Seamstress: Molly Rouge